Posted onAuthorChris BauerComments Off on MERCH: Bad Merch from Good Movies
Star Trek Urn
Even if I kinda like Star Trek and my life is pretty lame, I still wouldn’t allow my ashes to be plopped into this. Would you?
Jar jar Binks Lollipop
Never buy your kids (or anyone!) this disturbingly sexual Jar Jar Binks lollipop. Sicko.
Indy’s Luxurious Hat
Are you willing to waste $975 on this fedora? Adventurebilt encourages buyers to visit the studio for an hour “during which we can have a good conversation about your hat over a cup of coffee or a glass of whisky and a good cigar.” No thanks.
Jacket looks nice but… seriously? $500? Is Brad Pitt included in the package?
The Passion of the Christ’s Official Nails
The makers of The Passion of the Christ merchandise write on their website, “Our mission is to reach the world with the message of hope … ” Apparently, this message of hope is best expressed by wearing sterling-silver necklaces shaped like the nails used to kill Jesus.
James Bond’s Eternal Flame
In 1962, Dr. No launched the James Bond franchise and this $36 candle is one of the items. I know right? How manly!
Alice in Wonderland’s Versace Shoes
These Alice in Wonderland-inspired Versace shoes cost $1,195. What??? They’d have to pay ME if they want me to wear these shoes.
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1. Read Lethal Weapon screenplay. Fellow UCLA (and Comedy Club) alum Shane Black changed the rules of screenwriting with this script. Notice how it reads more like a comic book. He even uses the “action” (the descriptive bits between the dialogue) to add a bit of self-aware humor. It’s tight, it’s funny, and it launched a franchise […]
Don’t confront him in front of his girlfriend or sister or mother. Every guy wants to be a hero if his girlfriend or sister is around so you better not poke his ego during those moments. That spells H-E-L-L for you. And, of course, it is very rude in general. Talk to him in private. […]