They say no one gets to the top alone. That is true to any profession but especially to the ones in the arts. You see, in art-related professions like filmmaking and music-making, there is no concrete gauge for your talent especially if you\u2019re still a newbie as opposed to new engineers or\u00a0 mathematicians- all they have to do is show their records or take exams to prove they\u2019re good . It\u2019s that black and white for them. With the arts, it\u2019s well, a bit more complicated. It\u2019s a combination of talent, taste,good marketing, and knowing the right people.<\/p>\n
You need other bands. All of us need to push each other to the top. Going to the top alone could be daunting and lonely.<\/p>\n
But some musicians are scared of even giving a quick smile to other musicians. For them, it’s just soooo gay. Just the thought of rubbing elbows with famous people gives them goosebumps. Some might not want to get friendly because they’re scared established bands would label them fake or as the \u2018trying hard newbie who\u2019d kiss anybody\u2019s ass\u201d. \u00a0And some of us just don\u2019t want to say hi because of our pride. \u201cWho do they think they are? We\u2019re all the same here. Why should I say hi first?\u201d mentality.<\/p>\n
But if you’re serious about increasing your contacts, here\u2019s what you need to do if you want to gain friendships from other bands:<\/p>\n
Acknowledge That you Need These People.<\/strong> Before anything, you have to realize that you need these people in your life. They will give you tips, give you advice, introduce you to more people, lend you their instrument or a few dollars, drive you home when you have no car, promote your album, promote your page, cheer you up when you\u2019re down,etc. No one understands musicians better than fellow musicians.<\/p>\n Change Your Mindset.<\/strong> The main reasons some musicians are reluctant to make friends with other musicians are: 1. They care too much of what people would think about them, and 2. They think people don\u2019t like them. It\u2019s about self-esteem, really. Always think that you\u2019re interesting and people like you even if you\u2019re still a small fry. They\u2019re just waiting for you to approach first because well, that’s how it usually goes. You\u2019re the new one and it\u2019s a rule of thumb that the new ones approach the more established ones- not the other way around. Remember, they were newbies at one point and they are sympathetic to the new ones. Of course this may not always be the case but it\u2019s healthier to cultivate this kind of thinking.<\/p>\n Make it Your Style.<\/strong> Some artists, especially the ones making dark music, want to be packaged as indifferent, deviant, anti-social. Getting friendly is just \u201cnot their style\u201d. But gosh, you have to develop social skills if you want people to at least recognize you. Don\u2019t play the stereotype. It\u2019s much better if you try to reach out and make connections. If you want, you can go back to being snotty\u2026when you\u2019re already famous. If you want. The antisocial style is boring and will not take you anywhere.<\/p>\n They\u2019re not Your Pimps.<\/strong> Do not talk about your album right away unless they ask about it. Just look at them as new friends and not as pimps. Trust me, they can detect if you\u2019re only trying to use them.<\/p>\n Make them Feel Special<\/strong>. If you want to turn-off your new acquaintances, talk about yourself, your band rehearsals, how you made your first album, your crazy fans, your future plans, what you think about the music industry\u2026blah,blah, blah. Hey! NEVER TALK TOO MUCH ABOUT YOURSELF. Instead, be genuinely interested in others and let them do most of the talking during the first meeting. Ask them questions. They like to feel like their opinion matters. Give that to them and you\u2019ll earn a friend. This, my friend, is what we call CHARM.<\/p>\n